Have you ever had one of those extremely humbling days? I had to learn from one recently.
My husband Jason was out of town, so I decided to do what I normally do when I’m on my own. Say yes to everything I am asked to do, pretend I am superwoman and over plan too much in our day.
After already running our three little children around ragged, we went to a friend’s house for dinner. When it was time to leave I gave my five-year-old Micah a five-minute warning, and then five minutes later told him it was time to leave. He threw the biggest brawling fit I have ever seen him throw, especially in front of an audience. I had never seen him this out of control, but of course I didn’t want to sound like I was making excuses for him. We left, apologizing all the way out the door. I know my friend loves me, but I couldn’t help but wonder if that was the last time she would ever invite me over after that scene.
We walked into our house, where I looked at us in the mirror. We looked exhausted, and my skin was burnt only in the places where I missed sunscreen. (That’s always a nice look.) My kids were dirty from a day outside. They needed baths but there would none; we were going straight to bed. Then I looked down, one of my pant legs was rolled up at least four inches higher than the other. Apparently I was too busy all day to notice. I walked around Target and went to a friend’s house looking like this.
I know days like this happen, but I had to take some responsibility for the humiliation I was experiencing. I learned a few things that day.
First, I am a “yes” girl, while Jason is good at saying “no.” This difference in our personalities gets us into trouble often, but it is also the very thing that complements each other well. When Jason is gone, my spontaneous and overly-optimistic-with-time personality kicks in and I then experience the negative consequences that can have on our family. The way that Jason plans and designates our time balances out my desire to say yes to everything and visa versa. Though personality differences in marriage can be a major source of conflict, God knew exactly what he was doing when he put us together. I e-mailed Jason right away to tell him how much I appreciate his personality even when it’s so different from mine.
Second, this particular day was unfortunately not in my top humbling moments. I’ve had many more, but I am learning to be thankful for embarrassing situations. Humiliation is one of the ways God uses to make us humble.
1 Peter 5:5 says that “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” I would much rather be experiencing God’s favor than opposition. If left to myself I would think way too highly of myself, but when I hit certain lows I am brought to my knees in prayer. Humbling circumstances remind me that I can’t do everything on my own. They remind me that Christ is my strength in my weakness, and I am nothing without him, but everything with him.
Third, I learned that day that I should probably check to make sure my pants are not four inches off in length before I leave the house the next time.
Are there personality differences in your family members that cause tension, but may also be a way that you balance each other? Is there a circumstance in your life that you cannot get through on your own right now? Maybe God is bringing you to your knees…wanting you to trust him so he can show his work and power in your life.
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