Write It On A Rock

Do you ever have days where you feel completely inadequate to do what’s been asked of you?  Days when you want to throw in the towel.  Maybe it’s your job, parenting, marriage, finances, a relationship, health or other responsibilities.

I have more moments where I feel inadequate than I care to admit, but as much as I hate moments where I feel inadequate or overwhelmed, they have become somewhat of a blessing.

Sometimes you have to get down to nothing before you’ll believe that you need to rely on God.

You have to be at that point where you feel like shouting, “I’ve had it, I can’t handle this. God this is too much for me.”  If you are having one of those moments I encourage you to get on your knees for whatever it is you’re struggling with.

Sometimes we trust Jesus to save us for eternity but then act like He’s left us to deal with life on our own.  His grace is overflowing into every crevice of our lives if we rely on Him to live through us.

That is why we need bad days, moments of frustration and humility.  It shows God’s glory in our lives when we call out to Him and He answers.

A year ago, I was pregnant with Jasper and taking care of our three preschoolers.  I was sick, tired, hormonal, and many days feeling like a failure as a wife, mother and friend.  The sickness of the first trimester of pregnancy was causing me to want to crawl in a hole.

At the end of one of those particularly hard days, the day felt like a blur of putting out fires with the kids, to yelling out of frustration when they misbehaved.   Yet I felt too tired to problem solve or fix any of it.

As I rocked my one-year-old daughter before bedtime, I thought, “how am I going to mother four little children well?”  I knew we could do it, but well?  With sanity?

It was that moment of humility.

God I need You to show up because this battle isn’t happening without You.  In that moment I remembered the Old Testament stories I had been reading in the Bible and hope filled me up, leading my soul from downcast to peace filled.

I remembered that God has always been faithful to me.  He has never let me down, though I’ve had disappointments in life.  He has always been with me.  He always provides what I need.

I lifted my open hand up in the air as a sign of surrender while rocking my little girl in her pitch dark room, and whispered “Jesus, You are faithful, You are faithful, You are faithful,” over and over until I remembered that truth fully.

Something amazing happened in that moment.  All of my problems became so small, so trivial, as I remembered who my Father is.   I knew that He was big enough to provide all that I need.

A year later I can see answers to prayer and that, yet again, Jesus has been more than faithful as I trusted Him.

The story of Gideon from the Bible fed my soul that summer day, and has encouraged me since that even when I’m the underdog, when I’m discouraged, God has a greater purpose, which is to show His strength .

Gideon was the youngest son.  And if voted on for a position, he would probably be voted “the least likely to succeed.”

Yet God came to him and called him a “valiant warrior,” and told him to lead his people out of the oppression under the Midianites, who were ruining all of their crops and leaving them with no food.

Gideon could not believe that God would choose him.  It didn’t make sense, but God did anyway.

I love this because I feel like I am an unlikely candidate for many of the tasks I attempt to do.

But, when does God ever choose the most likely candidate in the Bible?

Not only did God choose an unlikely candidate to lead Israel, but He took their decent sized army and decided to make it almost nothing.  He wanted to show that it wasn’t their army winning the battle, it was God.

You can guess what happened.  God’s people won the battle that day, and they did not lose one life with their tiny army.  (Scroll down to the bottom if you don’t know the story.  It’s a good one).

God could have used the whole army and done the same thing, but that would have given the Israelites a reason to think it was their strength that won the battle.

God got Gideon’s army to almost nothing, to a point of embarrassment, and yet in the end He won.

We all have moments where we feel lost, overwhelmed, and in need.  When you find yourself in one, remind yourself that there is a gem of goodness in the midst of that battle.

If God did not bring me to a place where I know that, if He doesn’t show up this battle is lost, I unfortunately would probably take the credit for the win.

I don’t know that I would believe it is truly God who is answering my prayer, not just coincidental, if I were not brought so low.  I would also miss out on the opportunity to learn more about God and His mercy that He is willing to work in my life.

Do you have a task at hand that you feel inadequate to perform?  Maybe God has brought you, as well, to this battle so that you can trust him, and see His glory more fully.

Story of Gideon Continued …

[Gideon had thirty-two thousand people to fight, while their opponents were “as numerous as locusts.”  There were a whole lot of solders that they were up against, and yet God goes and tells Gideon to send all but three-hundred men back!  Three hundred men!  I am no military expert, but it is easy for anyone to see that this does not make sense. God says to them, “I will deliver you with the three hundred men.”

The Israelites have learned the hard way that when God says to do something, no matter how ridiculous, you do it.  So, God gives Gideon instructions to divide up the 300 men, and have them take torches in one hand and trumpets in another.  He had them make a lot of noise, yell, break pitchers, and blow trumpets.

Their enemies thought that the Israelite army was too large based on the ruckus, so they got scared and confused.  They turned on each other with their swords and self destructed.  The Israelites won the battle that day.  They did not lose one life.]

If you want to read the story of Gideon in its entirety, you can read it here or find it in your Bible in Judges 6:7- 7:23.